How to Control Your Anger
One of the traces of living a blissful lifestyle is attaining a healthy and well-balanced mindset. However, quite too often, we allow anger to get the best of us which in most cases can compel you to make rushed decisions that would otherwise seem extreme.
Being angry because of annoying situations is quite natural and it happens to the best of us. Nonetheless, if you allow your anger to have a strong hold on you, you will find that you’re always misbehaving so much so that even little nudge will result in you crossing the line. For example, your child mistakenly dropped a plate, a paper jam in the printer, your husband’s wandering eye, or loud neighbourhood children will all become channels to an avoidable outburst of anger.
Recommended Post: Affirmation: Anger Management – I release anger from my soul.
The good news is that you can triumph over your anger – you can control your anger! Although you can not avoid other people’s actions (especially the one’s that really know how to wind you up till you crack!), but you can learn other sets of actions for releasing those stress! Anger, if not controlled has the power to destroy relationships. Once you learn how to free yourself from the all-consuming anger that affects your everyday decisions, you will be able to strengthen your relationship with your spouse, children and friends!
Below are 7 simple strategies that can help you control your anger:
1. Disconnect yourself from the situation.
If you find yourself in a situation where your blood is beginning to boil, excuse yourself from the room (I mean, physically move – not just switch off). Grab a bottle of water, get some fresh air, or even call a friend to vent. Allowing yourself a few minutes to strategise an amicable approach to the challenge will enable you to strive for diplomacy.
2. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes.
Marital arguments for example, can often get out of hand. Before you blurt out a vindictive phrase, think about the other person’s feelings. There is a saying in Africa that “words are like eggs, when they break they cannot be put together again”. Even seemingly insignificant phrases, such as, “You’re such a momma’s boy,” or “You don’t do anything for this family,” can be a big punch.
- Seek a solution, not a debate. If he’s a momma’s boy, ask him to focus his attention on you and the kids. If he spends too much time watching football, tell him how much you miss your weekly date night.
3. Visualize the outcome.
Giving your boss a piece of your mind may lead to being terminated. Biting your tongue may pose a challenge, but the security of a weekly pay-package is well worth the effort.
- If your boss is placing unnecessary pressure on you, respectfully ask for more control over your responsibilities by asserting the reasons you’re a trustworthy employee.
4. Ask for assistance.
If you’re angry about a printer malfunction or not being able to unfreeze your computer, simply ask for help. Most people like to feel needed and asking for their expertise in a certain area will not only boost their confidence, but will also give you a simple solution to your challenge.
- Examine their approach to the issue and remember the steps so you can remedy the situation in the future.
5. Calmly explain your feelings.
Take some time to compose yourself and think about what truly upsets you. What exactly sets off your flame? Sometimes, anger is a defensive mechanism to prevent the world from knowing your feelings have been hurt. Remember, it is perfectly acceptable to be vulnerable. If you feel disrespected or hurt, you deserve to have the issue addressed.
6. Take the high road.
Retaliation is a sign of immaturity. If someone has intentionally wronged you, they likely did so in order to squeeze a frantic reaction out of you. Show them that you’re the reasonable party in the situation by being calm, cool, and collected.
7. Laugh it up.
When you’re frustrated, your body needs to exert energy. You typically default to exerting negative energy. But, negative reactions add more fuel to the fire. Diffuse the argument by laughing. Laughter allows you to expel energy, while internally easing your frustration as the body recognizes laughter as a sign of joy.
In conclusion, the most effective method of controlling anger is by making sure that your reactions are based on reason and not on emotion. Being able to detach yourself from the situation at hand will allow you to clear the smokescreen of personal resentment and focus on creating an amicable outcome. Remember, anger doesn’t have to control you – you call the shots and so you can control your anger!
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